What sets you apart from everything else in the world? What defines you?

Boundaries between you and a loved one, you and your child, and even boundaries within your own self are vital in discovering your identity.

My therapist has helped me to find a boundary within myself: the line between my wounded inner child and the adult that I now am. A very small part of me is hurt by traumas of the past. I was left feeling emotional, reactive, and an imposter of adulthood. I didn’t feel like I could become a mother, or a wife or any grown version of myself without feeling like I’m stuck in the age of my trauma.

That is my inner child. She is wounded from the past and loves to take the reigns when I’m trying to grow. When I’m anxious about conflict, when I jump after a loud noise, when my stomach churns at any sign of yelling or fighting… That is when she takes over.

I’m learning to create a boundary between her and myself. She is only a very small part of me, not who I am altogether.

Now that I’m an adult, I am responsible for that child. I will give that inner child the love and attention and nurturing it needs because she never got it from her mother. She never will. This is also something I need to teach her. Let go.

Doing this, I think, is my first step in finding my self and living myself. Do you have an inner child you need to nurture?

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